Update from Suzy on June 2:
Hello everyone. I wanted to offer an update. It is hard to believe it has already been four weeks without Steven. The void that has been left by his profound impact on the community is devastating.
We are slowly, but surely putting ourselves back together again, though I think some pieces will never fit back quite like they did before. Eudora is focused on her studies, finishing the school year – AND MIDDLE SCHOOL. She is looking forward to going on vacation with her mom at the end of the school year.
I am handling all the fun the stuff. Finding a routine when your person was half of it (if not more) for so long is proving challenging. Evenings continue to be difficult, but with each passing day a semblance of normalcy appears, brief as it may be.
I attempted a beach trip. Too many reminders and memories, and the safety of my home called me back. Visiting friends in new place however, has been a much needed respite before returning to reality. Different scenery ( and time zones ) have proven incredibly helpful. I hope to take more trips this summer and to explore the places Steve and I planned to see together.
I am anxious to start working with a grief counselor. I have found someone who appears to be a perfect fit. She is however, out of network (we love our healthcare systems). This could prove to be cost prohibitive, so any support will help to fund mental healthcare as well as aid in necessary loose ends that I am working to tie up neatly.
Your generosity has truly been overwhelming. I also inspired by the community I am so thankfully a part of. What a blessing to be able to lean on one another during the hardest times our lives. I love you all. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I miss my guy madly. There’s so much I want to tell him. I keep his voice with me when I feel overwhelmed. And I remember “step back, take a deep breath.” We taught each other that. I find I am still learning from him even though he is gone. I hope he is proud of me, but I know he loved me and I know he loved all of you so much.